Reasons You Were Sad and/or Lonely on Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day has come and gone. Thank God. Personally, I'm not saying I was sad and/or lonely, but I find the commercialization of love sickening... especially when I have to put out the money. Howevere, single people on college campuses everwhere were definitely asking themselves, "Why me?" Here are few probably hurdles that you should consider leaping over within the next 364 days.

1. You've been letting yourself go.
2. You're a female chemistry, physics, or math major.
3. Your breath smells.
4. No one byt your mother could ever love you.
5. You're a resident advisor... pig.
6. You're a male chemistry, physics, or math major.
7. You don't deserve love.
8. You're too clingy.
9. Your significant other is busy cheating on you with your best friend.
10. It's not you, it's them... (it's really you)
11. You're saving yourself until marriage.
12. You are the kid who plays World of Warcraft in the middle of campus on the weekend.
13. You don't show enough cleavage.
14. You fart in public.
15. Everyone you've met recently was too drunk or high to remember your name.
16. You spend so much time studying, you've forgotten how to interact with human beings.
17. No one wants to get near your runny nose and cough.
18. Everyone knows you've got herpes. (Sorry RiRi)
19. You often forget to shower.
20. Your penis is too small.
21. You don't put out.
22. You're whiny and annoying, and overall a pathetic excuse for a human being.

>KABOOM<

Deeper Than Rap!!!

This isn't beef. It ain't even war. It's just embarrassing, homie. C0mca5t and I can't even call this a war of words, this is... a war of livelihoods... of credibility!

William Leonard Roberts II AKA Rick Ross Vs. Curtis James Jackson III AKA 50 Cent

This is the most serious beef I have ever seen. Maybe because many of the most scathing attacks have not come from diss tracks, but interviews and videos. It also happens to be the most RIDICULOUS battles EVER, maybe because of the way in which it began... but also in the way the participants (considering their checkered past) have carried them out.

"Rick Ross is doing good. I also complimented him that he had the #1 album. I said, 'Just don't stand too close to this fat piece of sh*t.' I'm saying that because of what [Joe's] trying to do. He runs to Miami and hangs out with them like he's running Miami? Does Fat Joe run Miami? I don't think Fat Joe runs Miami. I think people from Miami would be upset you're even questioning that. The fact he can influence DJ Khaled on the radio, does that mean Fat Joe runs Miami? ... I don't care if [Khaled] ever plays my records. He's not important enough to what I'm doing for it to matter. Not to say Miami doesn't count. He doesn't count for it to matter to me."
-50 Cent, March 31, 2008

Boy I wish Rawse listened. He started all this sh*t really. We all know what 50 Cent is capable of, he mentions what he is capable of. He was attempting to attack Lil Wayne, but he was not dumb as Ricky Ross and unwilling to become a marketing ploy for "Before I Self Destruct." The video was not out yet, but I figure I'll post it now without doing it twice. This ends short, but whatever... the diss is mentioned.



I love to pay a bill, can't wait to pay a rent/
Curtis Jackson baby mother ain't asking for a cent/
Burn the house down, gotta buy another/
Don't forget the gas can, jealous stupid motherf*cker

2 and a half bars set off the biggest beef in years. Never has 50 Cent been as THOROUGH since... like... Ja Rule!

More to come...

>KABOOM<

Our President is black, but I guess neither the color, nor the style of the Lambo, matter.

*click*

We interrupt this broadcast for A C0mca5t TV special:

Another beef is brewing up in the "hip-hop" industry that could end up veering out of control...literally. DeAndre Way and Shad Moss, better known as Soulja Boy (Tellem) and (Lil) Bow Wow, have exchanged choice words over the past few days that went from seemingly playful ignorance to sensitive bitchassness. However, this is not your normal beef. There are no cartoons, cops, or baby mothers involved; there are no threats to "put feet in niggas asses"; and thank God there are no rap battles between these two artists. Instead, they are settling their differences through a race for keeps...of Lambos. Let's see how this all came about...with commentary of course.....



I must admit, Soulja Boy's "Rich Nigga Shit" series is nothing short of comedic. However, Soulja Boy, you cannot rely on Youtube views and comments to feed you! "Crank Dat" will not last forever. Your last album went air. Arab will probably sell 5 more albums than your sophomore effort. And we're in a recession. You're a semi-smart kid. You already got property. Good. You take care of your family. Great. Like you said, you came up in one year. What's gonna happen next year? You want to be a good role model to the kids? *marketing ploy* You want to show the kids some REAL "rich nigga shit?" Show the kids what to really do with money: buy stocks, invest in more property, own the Atlanta Hawks. Let your money grow before you start showing it all off. No hate though.

This is how Bow Wow replies.....



Ok...now maybe I'm just a poor ass nigga...but who said the "Lamborghini Club" can't include the Gallardo? Someone please inform me, cuz if yall don't want "The Poor Man's Lamborghini", I know one person who wouldn't mind having it! Anyway, so yea...no harm done, right? Friendly competition? Not to Soulja Boy, who seemed to take his response a little too personal.....



Bow Wow calling Soulja Boy a "little nigga" and Soulja Boy demonstrating how "little" that "nigga" Bow Wow is...funny. Commenting on how you bought your Lambo with his "Marco Polo" money...funny. Attempting to expose him as being a fake...low blow. Unless you just completely stopped liking Bow after his video, which I doubt, you can't call a man out for being fake, even if it is true. If me and my boy were to start making fun of each other in the middle of the mall or something, I'm not gonna bring up how he used to wet the bed up until last year for the whole public to hear. That's just wrong. *None of my boys wet the bed...just an example.* Oh, and the doors on a Gallardo don't go up because they were made that way. It has nothing to do with the top dropping or anything else.

Here, Bow Wow tries to clear his name.....



First, you are not from Atlanta. You are from Ohio, a no-name city in Ohio at that. You cannot try to rep Godby Rd. or Bankhead like you a native homie. You are not JD. Nigga YOU wouldn't step a foot in Bankhead. Stop flexin'. Second, get your info straight. Lamborghini is an Italian company. All lambos are made overseas, including the Gallardo. Automobili Lamborghini is owned by Audi, which is owned by VW *which will soon be owned by Porsche.* Maybe you just happened to get a bit confused since, yes, the Gallardo's parent company is Audi AG, however, your Murcielago is under VW AG parent company. Since VW owns Audi, you really had no room to comment on where his car was made. Third, that was not conclusive evidence that you bought that car. Where is the slip? That could have been your registration to a totally different car. *granted I still think it's actually your car, but prove it* Fourth, SPIT THAT DAMN TOOTHPICK OUT! Fifth, that suspense noise...funny. Sixth, the "rich nigga shit" plug...funny. Seventh, talking about buying 100k of iSouljaBoyTellEm...to save his life...funny. Finally...don't seem so hurt next time. You seem like "Ramone" *his middle name is ACTUALLY Cortez* actually ruffled your feathers kid...chill out homie. In any case, Bow Wow ripped Soulja Boy a new one with this video. If he can't win this race, he can kiss his career good-bye.......through the phone.

So, there you have it folks at home. The race is being set up, with a few business moves credited to "Lamborghini" Moss. What made him refer to himself as Lamborghini? *He should replace it with Shad* How will Soulja Boy reply? Who will lose their car? Who cares? And where did THIS nigga come from trying to get in on the action?.....



I guess that "Beautiful Girl" didn't make him commit suicide after all...his doors don't go up.

This is J.B. Charisma, bringing you what other people already brought...with commentary. Only on C0mca5t TV.

Now back to your originally scheduled program.

*click*

Welcome c0mca5t!

One of my homeboys wanted to get on the debauchery. Which is cool because I got kinda busy. A lot of bitchassness to comment on. We'll get right on it.

>KABOOM<