Reasons You Were Sad and/or Lonely on Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day has come and gone. Thank God. Personally, I'm not saying I was sad and/or lonely, but I find the commercialization of love sickening... especially when I have to put out the money. Howevere, single people on college campuses everwhere were definitely asking themselves, "Why me?" Here are few probably hurdles that you should consider leaping over within the next 364 days.

1. You've been letting yourself go.
2. You're a female chemistry, physics, or math major.
3. Your breath smells.
4. No one byt your mother could ever love you.
5. You're a resident advisor... pig.
6. You're a male chemistry, physics, or math major.
7. You don't deserve love.
8. You're too clingy.
9. Your significant other is busy cheating on you with your best friend.
10. It's not you, it's them... (it's really you)
11. You're saving yourself until marriage.
12. You are the kid who plays World of Warcraft in the middle of campus on the weekend.
13. You don't show enough cleavage.
14. You fart in public.
15. Everyone you've met recently was too drunk or high to remember your name.
16. You spend so much time studying, you've forgotten how to interact with human beings.
17. No one wants to get near your runny nose and cough.
18. Everyone knows you've got herpes. (Sorry RiRi)
19. You often forget to shower.
20. Your penis is too small.
21. You don't put out.
22. You're whiny and annoying, and overall a pathetic excuse for a human being.

>KABOOM<