A Day in History

Or, One A-hole's Take on a Day in History

Tuesday, January 20, 2009. LITERALLY the start of a new chapter in history. If you weren't there, you were watching. If you weren't watching, you're more pitiful than terrorist, because I guarantee Osama found a tv in his cave to watch the "house negro of America."

Unfortunately I didn't skip class like the patriotic nigga I should have, so I came at the start of the ceremony. I did see the First family walk in. The girls were cute as usual, although the oldest one was that awkward bowlegged walk like her momma. Prez knew that it was cold, negro should have had a hat on! Tryna front... I would have been up there with my hat, dog ears down!



Did anyone else feel like Rev. Rick Warren's prayer was more of a political statement? I wasn't feelin the way Rev. Warren said the girls' names. I figure dude knew he was dealing with ethnic names, so he was just going to attack them like the devil. SASHA... and MALIA.

I can't mess with Aretha Franklin. Not the queen. Maybe her church hat... but not her.

Vice President Joe Biden is cool. I bet he's not going to be talking sh*t about Barack anymore though. A administration of rivals turned pole jockers? I doubt it, but everyone is going to be giving homeboy his proper respect.



That John Williams piece was tight! I hope it's on iTunes. That cellist was looking at the violinist like they were battling. The violinist focused like he wasn't even worth it LOL. I loved how SASHA was cuttin up on the violinist though, that lil diva. Cut up any more and I'm sure Michelle will be giving those Executive *ss Whoopings.



Chief Justice John G. Roberts is a hater and I know he screwed up the oath on purpose! Prez tried to save face, but he had already jumped the gun. Or was that another f*ck up for his honor?!

We must note however, that Obama was President as of 12 noon according to the law established by the Constitution. He took the oath around 12:30. Does anyone else recognize the onset of... CP TIME? I hope this isn't a habit for our first Black President.

Prez got in that *ss. People were talking about how this wasn't a speech for the ages. It wouldn't resonate like his race speech or his speech on Election night. I think it wasn't the time for rhetoric. It was a sound off on the things that plague America's people, her safety, and her values. He told it like it is and what it should be, not feel good sh*t like how it could be. He challenge those terrorists and rogue states without alienating the people they "represented," so much better than "bring it on" or "dead or alive."

I messes with it. Feel me?

The poet was strange to me. Maya Angelou would have been my only choice. If she can do a Tyler Perry film she can definitely spare time for the Inauguration. But oh well.



The Reverend Dr. Joseph E. Lowery was funny. Even though he co-founded the SCLC with MLK, I don't think he gets as many props because he's still alive. If he was assassinated, maybe we'd be enjoying a holiday in his honor too. His prayer was tight, though I'm sure some white people didn't think his "white finally believe what's right" comment was nice.



YO, the Prez's limo is a Cadillac Escalade with 36 inch rims! I guess I check a see "the Beast," the Secret Service nickname for the limo, all the time in the hood. I didn't get those agents walking beside the limo. If it's built like a tank then it can take most explosions, right? They can't. And even if someone were to just try, those guys are still SOL.

I feel bad for Senators Ted Kennedy and John Byrd, but seriously, could we just get like small updates on their condition. This is the President's Inauguration celebration, stay focused.

Why the hell was CNN so fascinated with the fact that the Obamas had rhythm? I am not going to get on their *sses for their obsession with what Michelle and the girls were wearing, I'd like to think it was more about them being young than they being Black. Those commentators were treating them like they were in a zoo though, gawking at every little thing they did.

And why were they so caught up in the fact that the President and First Lady would be out until 3 in the morning or so. Do they not realize that the Obamas are from Chi-town? They are not homebodies like them old men before them, they are young (enough) and hip.

And apparently Black, because they were running late AGAIN.

CNN didn't want to say the real reason why past presidents didn't connect with the majority Black DC area, but Black people know why this Black president can shout them out the Neighborhood Ball. Black people will also not be surprised if the next president suddenly drops the ball.



Michelle Obama was looking good. Big ups to Prez for shouting her out, Black men need to know how to treat their Black women. If I was Barack, Secret Service would have been on extra call, because I would have been hopping into the crowd fighting any nigga that whistled at her.

MALIA and SASHA better have had their butts in bed. I know they had school today! My 2 lil sisters are the same age, just as big divas too...

BTW, work the next morning at 7:45 AM? Not for this nigga.

>KABOOM<

DJ Blazita And Gutta Muzik - New York, We Get It In

Tracklist:
01. 50 Cent ft Biggie - We Get It In (blazita mix)
02. 50 Cent - In God We Trust
03. Busta Rhymes ft Jadakiss & Freeway - Conglomerate Remix
04. Uncle Murda - Murdera
05. Jadakiss – Cant Stop Me
06. Busta Rhymes Red Cafe & Jadakiss ft Josh Xantus – Lets Ride Remix
07. Red Cafe – So Easy Remix
08. Nore – NY Groove
09. Busta Rhymes – Cant Take It
10. Hell Rell – Calm Down
11. 50 Cent – Shut Your Bloodcot Mouth
12. 50 Cent – Play This on the Radio
13. 50 Cent – Heartless Monster
14. Tony Yayo ft Red Cafe – My Swaggers Official
15. Nino Bless - Murdera
16. French Montana ft Maino – You Gotta Feel Us
17. Red Cafe ft Fabolous & Paul Cain - There He Go Remix
18. Jadakiss ft Faith Evans – Letter to BIG
19. Maino – Letter to Pac
20. Jadakiss – I Stay Ten Toes Down
21. Jae Millz ft Nicki Minaj – Five O
22. Skyzoo – Bells and Whistles
23. Joell Ortiz ft Joe Budden – Move On
24. Fabolous – Brooklyn We Go Hard Freestyle
25. MC Lyte - Brooklyn
26. Evil Eye ft Clap Cognac – Law & Order

Bonus:
27. Notorious BIG – Guaranteed Raw

DOWNLOAD

>KABOOM<

Negro Please... of January 18, 2009

A North Carolina theater has suspended showings of Biggie's biopic "Notorious" after a man was shot at the venue opening night (Friday, January 16). According to the Associated Press, a 32-year-old man was shot twice during an argument at the Grand 18 theater on Friday and around 700 people were evacuated from the venue.

The victim was rushed to a nearby hospital where he underwent surgery and is believed to be in stable condition.

A spokeswoman for the Grand 18 Theater said that customers who had tickets for the Friday showing of Notorious will receive refunds.

What the f*ck can some niggas in North Carolina get into an argument about while watching a movie about a New York rapper? Maybe one was aggy because the movie doesn't depict the fact that B.I.G. was a dealer in N.C. before he was finally pullin in money for rap. Country *sses...

I don't know why the theater is not going to show the show the movie anymore, in the words of Rollo Goodlove, "Niggas is just gon' be niggas! So you might as well get that money while you bullsh*ttin'."



"Notorious" opened in theaters nationwide Friday. The film came in at second place in the box office yesterday grossing an estimated $8.3 million.

>KABOOM<

Biggie = Obama? Negro Please... of January 17, 2008

Dipset rappers (or former Dipset rappers) Jim Jones and Juelz Santana will be providing a free screening of the film, Notorious, to fans. The film covers the life of the late Christopher Wallace, also known as Biggie Smalls and the more popular Notorious B.I.G.

B.I.G was gunned down on March 9, 1997 (a day before my birthday... depressing year) leaving an after-party in California. The slaying has remained unsolved as the rapper’s mother, Voletta Wallace and wife, Faith Evans, continue to seek justice in the aftermath of the tragedy.

"I never got a chance to meet him, so this is me as a Harlem dude saluting a cat from Brooklyn, in a small but meaningful way," Juelz stated. "Jim and I figured that so many people in the Hip-Hop community would be going to the see the movie individually; if we can make it so that everyone sees it together, that's a great thing."

Ditto to that. Most regions are too proud to big up a pioneer from another one, try to convince some ATLiens to get that chip off their shoulder.

However, someone is always going overboard...

"I did it for Hip-Hop," said Jones, who compared B.I.G. to another trailblazer. "It's as big as Obama's being the first black president. This is part of our history in the urban community; Biggie was our first Obama."

Word? Negro Please.

Forget B.I.G. Forget 2Pac. Forget Pimp C. God bless the dead, but NO rapper, dead OR alive, can be compared to President Barack Obama's historic win. "Ready To Die," "All Eyez On Me," or any other classic album by whatever hip-hop artist, any Black artist ever, cannot compare to this win for Black people everywhere.

Jim Jones is an ignorant nigga, not quite as ridiculous as Lil Wayne, but this takes the cake. I want to see "Notorious," but I'm not as geek'd for it as... oh... the Inaguration of President Obama. If someone offered me a free ticket to DC over some free screening, the choice would not be hard.

Biggie = Obama? SMH.

>KABOOM<

Yung Berg and the YouTube Slapper Phenomenom

So I'm behind on my posts... AGAIN. Between finding out some extra heartbreaking news in my personal life, getting back to school, and drama that picked me up from the airport and followed me to campus, I'm behind. I've gotten a lot of sh*t to air out... complain about, depending on your love/hater status.

Apparently, Ole Berg is still getting his *ss whooped again. This happened like a week and a half ago, but according to illseed and his infamous rumor mill, Berg and Master P's nephew, Young Trump, got into a fight last week. Surprisingly, no one got involved (not even Berg's security HAHA). The match was pretty even until Trump swung and knocked Berg out. Ole Berg's security then pushed Master P's nephew off and the club security broke it all up. It's not up on his myspace now, but Trump had a pic up that depicted a photoshopped Berg with bruises and such with a message, "yung-berg nigga we got yah!!!!!"

Well aren't we creative?

Cannon Ball Note: "Young Trump?" Negro Please.

Second, and more importantly, I think this a sign of worsening conditions in 2009, for both Yung Berg and us all. We have all grown accustomed to the hater and his devious, sometimes infectious, bitchassness. We have also watched and laughed at the beatdowns unfortunate person's experience on YouTube. 2008 was the year of the slapper, where everyone was experiencing this most demeaning types of assault. 2009, however, seems to be the year of the YouTube Slapper, haters who broadcast their "alleged" feats of bitchassness online.

You see the combined might of the disrespect we have left to fester all these years now???

What you got on a WWJD band for nigga?! Jesus don't threaten anyone with beatdowns!

Now, I don't like Sambo Boy, and I will tell anyone who listens or reads my blog (stay tuned). Maybe I'm a hater, or maybe I don't like the type of music he puts out or the image he portrays that convinces people our generation are a bunch of minstrels who appreciates slave masters. I guess it's hate then. BUT, this guy is ridonculous, and a good example of the bs that we are dealing it. Not to mention the grown *ss men who went on YouTube claiming they are the ones who robbed the Sambo and tried to kidnap on of his boys? Isn't that evidence of a felony?!

What's interesting is that, although there might not be footage of the actual slap, beatdown, etc of any superstar, you will most like fine someone taking credit for it. For example, search for Katt Williams getting slapped. Face slapping, chain snatching, home invading and car jacking masked bandits are no longer keeping their *ss in the shadows and behind the bushes. They want credit too, like the actual producers of some of these hit records. Rappers have been taking responsibility for all sorts of niggerdom recently to the relief of those who actually did it, ie, the smart niggas who are AVOIDING prosecution. Now some niggas are actually pretty stupid, and have been prosecuted for their Myspace page and YouTube channel.

The YouTube Slapper can't rap, but is steadily polejocking the most recent and fastest growing Hip-Hop trend since skinny jeans.

Is there anything that we can do about this? I doubt it. I believe this is just the next step in the evolution of hate. Instead of getting an education and become a law-abiding citizen, good father, or President, these young men are interested in leaching and robbing dudes of their success. We can pull the plug on these YouTube Slappers, but it's been happening in real life forever. It's so latent that we don't even notice anymore... have you ever though about how Rico from "Whoop Rico" feels?

Maybe we could dismiss all these YouTube Slappers who fake criminals who want infamy, or future criminals who will need a lawyer. But then we would probably have to dismiss all of our favorite snowman/thug/gangsta/REAL rappers. Yes, we all know that Young Trump (Trump...SMH) will never put out a credible album that will sell, but what about 50 Cent and his bullying? Or the Lil Wayne or Jim Jones and their Blood "affiliations?" Jay-Z hasn't hustled on the street in like 15 years, but he still goes hard like Brooklyn.

How about Maino, who has championed the "I Heart Haters" movement I so readily detest? What can he say, when he's bragging about slapping Ole Berg or beating up Lil Cease.



>KABOOM<

Star Wars/ Coming to America Mash-Up... A-HA!

This is ga-reat. You'll probably watch it 3 or 4 times. They mixed Star Wars footage with James Earl Jones lines from Coming To America. It is madd funny actually, but I think they could do even better with Mufasa's lines from Lion King.

A-HA!



>KABOOM<

20 Questions (February 2009)

So I'm a little early with the 20 questions, seeing as how it's January 11 and this is the February issue.

Sue me.

I'm a little excited about this issue however. My favorite artist (f*ck rapper or producer, despite what the cover says) is featured, Kanye West! I sound madd excited by I'm not... my heart was broken... 4 or 5 hours before I posted this blog, and I related to 808s & Heartbreak way more than I did 6 or 7 hours before. More on that later.

But I digress... 20 Questions! I think they're pretty lame btw, but hopefully I won't be as bad.

1. How many people have already broken their New Year's resolution?
Ha! You have to had MADE a New Year's resolution to break it!

2. Did T-Pain really call someone a copycat?
Yep. And I think he meant it.

3. If Chris Brown and Rihanna's matching tatts don't make things official, what will?
He calms his cheating *ss down and actually stay faithful. But you didn't hear that from me.

4. Plaxico Burress: When keeping it real goes wrong?
I'm gonna be real: If the Giants don't WIN the Super Bowl, I'll shoot him.

5. Aren't you secretly hoping the Obamas pick a Rottweiler as their White House dog?
As much as I had hoped Al Sharpton or Jesse Jackson would pray at Barack's Inauguration.

6. Why do we keep hearing that all of Jodeci is getting back together?
Yall keep listening for some reason. A better question is, why do you care?

7. What happened to Christina Milian's singing career?
Same thing that happened to her acting career.

8. Isn't Ripley's portrait of Eminem (made from M&M's) brilliant?
Eminem portait of M&M's, fitting and delicious.

9. When did Law & Order and CSI turn into resume builders for rappers- turned- actors?
Somewhere between Ice-T and Ludacris.

10. Are you sipping NUVO yet?
No, that sounds dirty, like Nuva Ring.

11. Can rappers please, please, please, (pretty) please stop creating clothing lines? (No, not Clipse, too!)
Yeah this is pitiful. It's not even like it's high scale like Pharrell's Billionaire Boy's Club or urban chic like Sean John and Rocawear, it's Wal-Mart brands like Master P's crap.

12. Are people done pretending Beyonce's new album is better than Solange's?
Are we going to start pretending that it actually matters if Solange's was better?

13. After Dedication 3, is Lil Wayne the "Best Skitmaker Alive," too?
Don't go there. I don't care if you got navigation don't go THERE! I love a b*tch with glasses too, Weezy!

14. Shouldn't 50 collect and endorsement check for suing Taco Bell?
After losing those few million dollars to the recession, he can use the money.

15. Don't you wish more artists were like Kanye and pushed their album release dates up instead of back?
I wish more artists were like Kanye and put out good music.

16. And who do we have to holler at to cop a pair of Air Yeezy's?
I thought you didn't care for any rapper's clothing line... hypocrite!

17. Won't it be cool to see The Roots as the house band for Jimmy Fallon's late-night show?
Who the f*ck is Jammy Fallon?

18. Is Black History Month still relevant?
Why do we need the shortest month in the year when we have the highest office in the land now? BI-YOTCH!

19. Why doesn't Carmelo Anthony talk to Allen Iverson about those tired braids?
If he doesn't get it by now, he just ain't gettin it.

20. Shouldn't Jim Jones and Juelz Santana be pouring champagne on the girls in the "Pop Champagne" video instead on each other?
In the words of Dipset, "No homo."

>KABOOM<